This boy is quite a conundrum to me. I spend a lot of time trying to find a better way to deal with each and every thing with him. We read books and articles, ask other parents for advice in what seems like an endless cycle of never ending work. I've never worked harder for a relationship. In fact, I wouldn't dream of working this hard for anyone who wasn't my child.
After a couple very serious events I finally called in for help. Today was our first session with a counselor and also turned out to be an ideal day of parenting for me. Play and work happened side by side, everything went smoothly, even the bumps. No one yelled and no one fought. It was amazing.
That isn't to say that other days haven't gone that way. Last week we had six days straight without too much drama. The last three days have been closer to hell. This is a much improved ratio already and I am hoping (beyond hope, really) that it is his age and the parenting tricks working synergisticly. I know you have to readjust your tactics often with little ones, but I haven't been keeping up at all lately. I've been sinking deeper and deeper into the mire.
The amazing thing is that I know, under the arguing lunatic and past the demanding ogre and behind the defiant gremlin, is a kid I really like. A kid who is fun and charming and brilliant and sweet. But those other guys have been crowding him out. I'm hoping and praying that nice kid is pushing his way out to come and play and stay more often than not. I need him. I love him. I am too worn down to figure it out on my own anymore. I'm glad for help.